Mug Shot

  Another exciting night for McKay and me! And, NO, it wasn't labor, geez, why would you even ASSUME that?

  Not sure how to lead into this, so I'll just jump in: It's incredibly difficult for me to do anything anymore. Even rolling over is the cause of much consternation. So, trying to get out of bed to pee at 2 AM while crawling over a body pillow and a cat = not very smooth me. Or, more accurately, me tumbling over the side of the bed and smacking my mouth on the open laptop I left next to the bed (the laptop was unharmed, THANK GOODNESS).

  Cue hysterical crying (really more from the surprise than the pain) and McKay rushing around like a chicken with its head cut off. I staggered my way to the bathroom (my leg got slightly jacked up as well), blood quickly pooling in my cupped hand. I couldn't look in the mirror until McKay told me I had busted my lip. This filled me with relief, as I had been terrified it was my teeth that were bleeding, and I get weird where my teeth are concerned (plus they friggin' HURT, almost more than the lip). I spent the next few hours sniffling and holding an ice pack to my lip and repeatedly asking, "Do you think my teeth are going to fall out?" while McKay babied me.

  Anyway, I realized just as I was nearing sleep that this incident has one more up-shot: I'll most likely get to look like an abused wife and/or white trash fight victim in all our first baby photos! Yay for me! Bad for McKay. "I fell out of bed" kind of feels like a "I walked into a door" excuse, I think he may be under close scrutiny at the hospital if Lincoln ever does decide he wants to make his appearance.

  You see it best when I pout, that's why I had to take dozens of close-up glamor shots. And, yeah, I know, my eyes are so beautiful, it's almost difficult to get to my lips, am I right? [disclaimer: this was supposed to be a joke. One my mother did not get, apparently]

P.S. Okay, seriously, any of you stalkers happen to be a dentist and know if my slightly wobbly/very tender front tooth will turn black and fall out? I'm not sure if that's really a thing, but my childhood fears tell me it is.