Saturday, March 2, 2013

Songs That Make Me Rant

  A lot of things make me rant. The Harry Potter movies. The phrase "I could care less". Kevin Bacon. The ending of LOST. Here are a few songs that are sure to have me ranting the whole time it's playing on the radio (and no, I can't just change the station because then I couldn't treat McKay to the same one-sided conversation he's heard at least a dozen times before).

  •   Taylor Swift's "Love Story". I think this song makes anyone even remotely acquainted with literature want to blow their brains out. Romeo and Juliet? Really? You want to kill yourselves over a series of small miscommunications? And the far, far worse comparison--HAVE YOU EVER READ THE SCARLET LETTER, WOMAN?? That makes no friggin' sense in your context whatsoever and is not as romantic as you think it is. Stop pulling allusions to literature into your songs if you don't know what they mean.
  • Michael Buble's "Just Haven't Met You Yet". I love/hate this song. It's really fun to sing along to, but it gets me ranting every time because it has some of the worst rhymes ever.  "I know some day it'll all work out/and you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.". Really? If you were to make a drinking game and take a sip for every time Michael says "work", you would be hammered after one playing. Or maybe not, I really have no idea how much drinking getting hammered requires. But still. I also dislike perpetuating the idea that OF COURSE none of your relationships have worked; You haven't met "the one" yet! Once you do, you will change all your ways and everything will magically WORK OUT. If it doesn't, well, then it just wasn't "the one", I guess! The problem could never possibly be you! [also take note of that, Tay-Tay]
  •  Bruno Mars' "Grenade". Geez, no wonder that chick wasn't that into you. You are WAYYY too intense. And kind of whiny. Reminds me of guys that would always complain about being "Friend Zoned". Dude, that was us being nice, saying we didn't want to ruin our friendship. Really, we were just not interested because you're creepy intense.


 Any of you guys have strong reactions to songs on the radio?

7 comments:

  1. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!! and I agree with the "I could care less."

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    1. Thank you! In my mind I always have to correct it. "Couldn't. It should be 'couldn't', dang it."

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  2. First, please write a post about your feelings to the ending of LOST. I love discussing it with people because I haven't fully formed my own opinion. . .

    Second, I pretty much don't like T Swift. And so of course Olivia loves her. I heard all of her lyrics when I taught high school, I don't need to hear them put to music. And anyone who says "we're never ever getting back together" is pretty much guaranteed to get back together with that person.

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    1. I think LOST kind of copped out. I was hoping the side-stories for the last season were going to be what their lives would have been if the island had never existed. Instead it's all in their heads and it's purgatory. Which to me is as lame as the "it was all a dream" ending. Also, lots of open ends for things that promised to be awesome that I can't remember anymore.

      Taylor Swift reminds me of every fourteen year old ever. Except she's older than fourteen and no longer has the right to be so freaking over-dramatic. Also, why does anyone date her anymore? If I were a man, I would steer clear of the crazy sauce. I'm sorry Olivia probably forces you to listen to her a lot.

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  3. I'm pretty sick of Alicia Keyes screaming that she's a girl on fire. She just sounds angry. Not empowered, not strong, just premenstrual without chocoate. I also hate the commercial with the girl who gets to the top of that monument in Utah & we have to hear, "Somebody left the gate open!" I feel like she should be singing, "I don't need a man ever, except maybe as a sperm donor because I'm not quite awesome enough to have a baby which I will raise on my own without his help." Maybe I've heard it too many times . . .

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    1. Oh my gosh, I completely agree about Alicia Keys. The reason I don't rant about that song is that I change the station immediately when it's on, can't stand it. Never heard of that commercial, though.

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  4. Sometimes when people say, "I could care less," I say, "Well at least you care some." They just give me a blank look.

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