Friday, February 15, 2013

Why We Shouldn't Go Out, or Happy Valentine's Day

  McKay and I had planned a very traditional Valentine's Day, keeping it sweet and simple. Reservations at Chinese restaurant? Check. Chocolates? Check. Redbox movie? Check. What could go wrong, right?


 We arrive at the restaurant at 6:00. After a short wait, we're lead to the table right next to the kitchen, tantalizing smells wafting out to us every time the door swings open or shut.

  6:30, we finally meet our waitress. On the plus side, it gives us time to get our order all sorted out: shakes, egg roll appetizers, chicken chow mein, and kung pow chicken.

  7:00, our waitress finally comes back. With our shakes. The smells from the kitchen are like knives to our growling stomachs.

  We start making bets on how long it will take to get our food. McKay guesses twenty more minutes. I guess forty. McKay thinks I'm crazy.

  If only.

  On a side note, did I mention Lincoln's bedtime is 6? And we brought him with us? Because it is, and we totally did. We didn't think it would be a big deal; dinner usually takes about an hour, right? And Lincoln loves people watching, and we'd feed him off our plates to keep him nice and distracted. But after the first twenty minutes, sugar packets and spoons just aren't cutting it on the entertainment factor. Finally, McKay takes him outside to walk around a bit while we wait for our food. I tell him I'll call if it ever comes.

  Two minutes later, the appetizers finally arrive. I call McKay and he hurries back in. We are starving, so the egg rolls are gone within two minutes. We give the last one to Lincoln to gnaw on as a distraction, and we watch him eat it enviously.

  We wait some more.

  The time is now 7:30. I win the bet. Sort of. There's still no food. Lincoln won't last much longer. We wistfully state we should have ordered our food as take-out. Then we could be home, watching our movie while we ate, with no baby wigging out.


  We snag our waitress the next time we spot her hurrying by and ask if we can get our food to-go. She agrees, and we congratulate ourselves on our awesomeness.

  7:45. The couple across from us who came AFTER us have had their food for ten minutes. We eye them jealously, our stomachs moaning in unison.

  7:50. The food comes in a giant paper bag to the sound of a Hallelujah chorus. You astute readers will notice that this is nearly two hours after we arrived.

  We rush home, put Lincoln to bed, and start our show. We rented Looper (to be watched on Clearplay, don't freak out), which we'd both wanted to see for some time.

  Two years ago, Looper would have been slightly disturbing to me. Now, McKay and I are both traumatized. We are apparently not desensitized enough to watch violence mixed with small children. When I go to the bathroom after the movie, I see that my mascara has been smeared halfway down my face. I resist the urge to go up to Lincoln's room and hold him close all night long.

  Not the best movie choice for Valentine's Day. McKay and I agree we should have gotten Pirates: Band of Misfits. We crawl into bed, thoroughly spent.

  Any of you guys have a Valentine's Day that didn't turn out quite as expected?



  1. Oh my gosh!! That is horrible. I've decided I'll go out for dinner on the 13th or the 15th, but the craziness of the 14th is too hard to escape!

    I spent significant time making my dinner Wednesday and yesterday, and it looked beautiful. And I put one bite in my mouth when there was a knock on the door and my in-laws arrived, giant plate of sugar cookies in hand. So we ate while they awkwardly watched. But it could be worse, I've got nothing on you!

    1. Wait, wait, wait . . . your in-laws came over, uninvited, on VALENTINE'S DAY? And then STAYED?! That is weirding me out.

    2. Well, we knew they were coming but we didn't know WHEN. So I told Adam that in the future we need a specific time, because this has happened before.

  2. Holy crap Kim...that is just crazy. Sorry Juj, yours was bad, but Kim's is just...I don't even know what to say. There are two days I don't want to associate with in-laws: the day after my wedding and Valentines day.
    Eric had to teach his college class this year from 6pm to 9pm, so we did nothing. Really, we've been lucky for Valentines Days in the past because it is not a holiday I care a lot about. I don't like being told I have to show love because a certain random day the card industry picked rolled around. Not that I hate the idea, just the dictation of it all.
    I like my anniversary a lot more, which is why we have had HORRIBLE anniversaries. Like Eric being out of town, twice, or having to see Shallow Hal (never worth seeing, but especially so on an anniversary) on our 1st because our reservations for THE FIRST FREAKING HARRY POTTER MOVIE got mixed up. We've also both been sick, had sick kids or Boy Scouts on them. I think we've had about 2 normal ones in 12 years of marriage. Sorry to vent. I'm sorry everyone had a bad Valentines.

  3. So sorry Kimberly, Julia and Nicole!!!!!!!!!!! On another note, my Valentines wasn't too bad, just to cheer you all up!! I made a nice eggplant parmigiana (ala Costco), some spaghetti, french bread and pulled my home made crock pot spaghetti sauce out of the freezer to add a little extra sauce. Also made a lovely spinach/strawberry salad with candied walnuts (very EASY to make, but looks very nice!). Sorry you guys didn't have a good day!! But then again, I don't live by my in-laws, my baby is 14 and set the table, cleared the table and helped with dinner and my almost missionary is 18 and (besides bringing me breakfast in bed and writing the most amazing note an 18 year old son could muster) did dishes and helped out too and my hubby cleared the table, so, does get better, but we still don't go out on the 14th!! (We went to the temple and a place called The Veggie Grill in Santa Monica on the 15th.) Happier Valentines day to come!!!

  4. So Rob made kabobs for us that night, and they were pretty good, but only after I was almost done eating told me what the meat was...

    Cow heart.

    Whaaaat?? He laughed and said he thought it was fitting for Valentine's Day. I'm usually a pretty adventurous eater, but I'll admit that after that even I couldn't finish the kabob I was working on. I'm pretty sure this was finally retaliation to my fake labor prank pulled nearly a year ago. What a goober.
    He did make a bomb dessert to follow though, so I couldn't be mad. :)