Halloweenies 2014

   Skipping birthdays and all that junk, heeeeere's Halloween!

  So, I chose a "Firefly" (Joss Whedon's amazing space-cowboy-outlaw masterpiece) theme for this Halloween back in . . . June? I figured Lincoln's costume would take a bit of work, and mine and McKay's would be easy-peasy. I was going as Kaylee, McKay as Wash, and Lincoln as Mal. Here are some reference pictures if you don't know:

Wash upper left, Kaylee upper right, Mal on the bottom. Anyway, I figured for mine and McKay's the main thing we'd need is coveralls. McKay already had a Hawaiian shirt from a different Halloween costume that didn't pan out, and I figured there'd be a billion shirts like Kaylee's at the thrift store, it's got a very nineties vibe. 

  I . . . was wrong. My shirt was easily the hardest thing to find, I went to the thrift stores every few weeks since June and could find nothing. Also, coveralls are INSANELY expensive (at least to college students), and I looked for weeks to find some under $80. I finally found a website where they were listed at $40, and I leaped at it. Unfortunately, they didn't have any olive-khaki color in my size, so I bought the white with long sleeves. McKay's were spot on. 

  Here's a picture of my coveralls (and Lincoln, who couldn't understand the concept of a picture without him in it), after I'd already de-hemmed the sleeves into oblivion.

   Next was the dye. We don't have a washer and dryer, and I didn't want to potentially ruin a friend's next load with leftover dye, so I decided to use our sink. It was a long, long hour of turning the coveralls in the sink. And then I looked at the package for the thousandth time and realized I only had to do it for half that long. GAH.

  Here was the awful result! I was pretty disappointed at how uneven the dye job was (but, really, what had I expected with that huge thing bunched up in the tiny bathroom sink?), but then I remembered--Kaylee's coveralls aren't exactly squeaky clean. In fact, they're filthy. So I shrugged it off. And dyed them one more time in an attempt to make them slightly less mint green.

  McKay tried his coveralls on . . . to discover that the sizing was off. Way, way off. McKay's usually a 34-34, so I got a 36 to be on the safe side. When McKay pulled them on, he had a good five inches of ankle showing. I couldn't remember what site I'd bought them off of, plus I hadn't even bothered to have him try them on for MONTHS because I was so sure they were going to be large on him, so we were pretty much stuck. But since the Hawaiian shirt covered up the middle, McKay added a panel of cloth in the torso, and they fit pretty well after that. I got zero pictures of this process.

  Lincoln's costume turned out to be the easiest. Mostly thrift store finds, just needed some extra buttons on the pants for the suspenders, plus I added the brown line down the sides. The coat was from a cheap Hobbit costume we bought, so we've already got next year's Halloween pretty much covered for him.

  I had also bought some cheap temporary hair spray dye for McKay and I so we could be the brunettes/red heads we were supposed to be. I even thought I could share mine with Lincoln. But did you know that cosmetics people don't believe anyone would want to spray their hair a normal brown color? I looked at half a dozen stores, and none sold brown hair spray dye stuff. Finally found one that was labelled "burnt brown". Good enough.

  We decided to use the ward Halloween party as a test run for the hair dye. And thank goodness we did. It was a DISASTER. Dye everywhere, the fumes nearly made McKay throw up, my spray was way too dark, and because I have so much hair, it ran out before we'd finished. Leaving me with skunk hair. And McKay wasn't thrilled with his neon orange hair, either.

    Thank goodness we did it on me before Lincoln. He would've freaked the freak out.

   Lincoln kicking butt at the games. He did very well, mostly because people tend to let cute two year olds cheat. A LOT. After a few tries he gave up on throwing and gently placed the spiders inside the buckets.

   The sister missionaries were doing face painting. They nearly fainted when Lincoln said he wanted a train. I had to look up a picture of a train on my phone for reference. Lincoln liked the result at least.

  Wash, failing at bobbing for apples. He kept saying he was going to have to dunk his whole head to get the apple, but if he had that water would've been straight-up poison. Lincoln grabbed the apple for him in the end.

  And now on to real Halloween! We learned from our mistakes and decided not to try dying our hair again.

   We told Lincoln to blow off his gun, which naturally turned into raspberries.

     I'm sure there's some fanfic out there with Kaylee and Mal getting makey-outy.

   Mal probably doesn't have a runny nose in it, though.

   Lincoln was very, very ready to stop taking pictures and go trick-or-treating at this point.

Aaaand we lost him. He was off to ring doorbells.

It seemed like there were fewer houses with their porch light on this year, but Lincoln got SO EXCITED for each new house, it was really fun to watch. Every time we told him to say 'thank you', though, he would turn back to the street while signing it. After every house we'd say, "Be sure to say 'thank you' out loud, Lincoln," and make him practice. And then in the excitement of doorbells and candy he would turn his back while signing it. Again and again and again. Except for the few times he said, "Thank you out loud." The payoff was when we knocked on the door of a deaf man, who looked so excited to have someone say 'thank you' to him.

Zero recognition on our costumes, but that's okay. Nerdiness for nerdiness' sake is our game. Happy Halloween, everyone! Hope you had a fantastic, sugar-fueled night!

THE DOCTOR WHO 50TH SPECIAL, AGHHHHH!!!!

   Ahem. For those of you who know Doctor Who, you know that the special was back in November. I'm catching up still, leave me be! Anyhoo, I was crazy excited for the 50th. CRAZY EXCITED. I looked up news on it daily. Maybe hourly. I bought tickets to see it in theaters the first day they went on sale. I talked about theories involving Rose's reappearance with my mom on the phone for weeks. She humored me.

  So, November 23rd shows up, and I'm beyond excited. We get a babysitter, we drive close to an hour to get to a theater that was showing it, and McKay even dresses up in his Halloween costume from the year before, the 11th Doctor (which I did not get a picture of, sadly). We're running slightly late, which has me practically tearing out my hair because DOCTOR WHO. AND LATENESS. I REALLY HATE LATENESS. So I have McKay drop me off while he looks for a parking spot, I run up to the ticket booth, print out the tickets, and--

  The savvy among you will notice that the date on this ticket is for the 25th. I had somehow never paid attention to the fact that the special was showing on the 23rd for TV, and the 25th in theaters. What was that about, anyway? 

  I was crushed and hugely embarrassed, but McKay was very nice about it. I think he got a bit tired of me saying, "I am an idiot. I am such a ginormous idiot" after the 80th time, though. We ended up seeing Ender's Game instead, with McKay still in his 11th Doctor glory (we did get a couple of turned heads, thanks for asking).  I thought they did a fabulous job with Ender's Game, by the by. McKay was ambivalent. To be fair, though, he had re-read the book recently, which seems to be a huge factor on whether you enjoyed it or not. 

  ANYWAY, two days later, back we went on the hour-long drive to get to the theater to finally see THE DOCTOR WHO 50th ANNIVERSARY EPISODE! We didn't even watch it online during the two day wait (which was probably the hardest thing I've ever done, including labor) because we wanted our first experience seeing it to be on the big screen. 

  It was awesome, seeing a bunch of other people that love Doctor Who as much as us. Well, me. McKay likes it a normal amount. Like I've said, I like it a crazy amount. And the beginning video with Strax talking about movie etiquette (and eating screaming popcorn with great relish) alone made the price of admission worth it. But the 3D was pretty freaking rad, too. 

  I managed to snap this photo on the way out (I know none of these people, but I admire them all greatly). I love Doctor Who nerds. We're the best. AND HOW INSANELY ACCURATE ARE THOSE DOLLS?! Best ever.

  Thank you, McKay, for going along with my obsessions! And thank you, Doctor Who, for being awesome.

Merry Christmas from the Allreds! 2013 Edition (A Little Late)

  And to all a good night.

The Newlywed Game for FHE

Me: If you were to buy me a wig, what color would it be?

McKay: Black. You wanna know why?

Me: Uh, sure.

McKay: Because you're already blonde! Ha! Also, your eyelashes are so black and pretty.

Me: My eyelashes are half blonde. That's mascara.

McKay: Oh. Well, your mascara is so black and pretty.


ANOTHER QUESTION

Me: What's my astrological sign?

McKay: Scorpion! Wait, no. Is it a lion? Wait, I'm a lion, aren't I? Are you . . . a book?

Me: I'm a Libra, and you're a Leo.

McKay: Yeah, lion. And isn't Libra a book?

Me: [rubbing my eyes] It's scales, McKay.



  This is making McKay look kind of stupid. So let me just say now, McKay is extremely intelligent, and when he starts talking about his work, my face goes slack and drooly because it's all sciencey gibberish to me.

  That's why these moments need to be documented.

Normal Sunday Night

McKay: OW! You jammed my thumb!

Me: Well, that's what you get for blocking my kick, you jerk.



UPDATE: Once I was too tired to wrestle (it's really me trying to tickle McKay, and McKay wrestling to keep away from me since I'm usually not ticklish), I laid on the ground and played dead. McKay then walked around my corpse while cleaning up clutter, spouting a film noir-like soliloquy about how he would dispose of my body.

   This is true love in action, guys.

I Like Haunted Houses in Theory

Me: Let's never buy a house where someone was murdered, K?

McKay: But they're so much cheaper! Look at "Jumanji"!

Me: Yeah, but then terrible things happen. Look at "Jumanji".

McKay: But that wasn't because of the murders.

Me: Yeah, because no one was really murdered there! No murder houses.

McKay: . . . But they're so much cheaper!

Playing Taboo With Friends Last Night

Man Giving Clue: Kiss me, I'm--

McKay: JEWISH!

More Sleeptalking

THE SCENE: In bed, about 2 AM. I've had insomnia and I'm in the midst of battling an oncoming cold, so I've slept little. McKay whispers in the dark.

McKay: Oh, my gosh.

Me: [expecting he forgot an important deadline] What?

McKay: That guy totally just punched you in the face!

Me: Wait, what?

McKay: Wait a second. . . I think I may be dreaming.

Me: I suspect as much.

Totes

McKay: Angeline was catching me up on all the lingo the kids use these days.

Me: Like "totes"?

McKay: No, like how the shorten words. . . oh, yeah. Like "totes".

Me: "That's totes awesome".

McKay: Why?

Me: No, I'm just using it in a sentence. As an example.

McKay: Oh. Yeah. And I guess they say "'maze" for amazing.

Me: I say "maze-balls" sometimes.

McKay: Wait, what? Why?

Me: I don't know. Why do I say anything?

McKay: [walking away, shaking his head] I don't know about you sometimes.

Me: [yelling after him] Hey! It's totes legit!

Did I Know?

  As I mentioned in my last post, McKay and I have been married for three years now. We've told each other that we love one another more and more every year. And you know the funny thing? We really mean it.

  Looking back at when we were dating (heck, back when we first married), I thought I loved McKay. And I did. But now it feels like that was a microscopic smidgeon of love compared to how it's grown. Love is like a happy disease that way, spreading throughout your body. If you're lucky enough to be married to McKay, anyway.

  Did I know when we were engaged that he would make me feel beautiful every single day? Even in the morning and have no make up on and my hair is an inconsistent Afro?

  Did I know then that when I was pregnant McKay would massage my legs at three AM to make the Charley horses go away? 

  Did I know that he would wake up at 5:30 every morning to spend a few hours a day with his son and let me sleep in?

  No. No, I didn't.

  Did I really know for certain he would support my dreams, insist I stay in school, nag me to write my book, encourage me to try out for plays?

  Not really.

  Did I know he would be the best father I have ever seen? That he would make Lincoln laugh nonstop when they're together?

  Did I know McKay would take the time to appreciate all the little things I do everyday to keep the house clean?

  Did I know McKay would always apologize after he hurts my feelings? That he would be patient with me? That he would hold me when I cry and leave me be when I explain I need to be an introvert for a while?

  No.

  I loved him, and I placed my bets, but I didn't know.

  And I got more than I had ever dared to hope.

 

  Love you. More and more.

Why We Shouldn't Go Out, or Happy Valentine's Day

  McKay and I had planned a very traditional Valentine's Day, keeping it sweet and simple. Reservations at Chinese restaurant? Check. Chocolates? Check. Redbox movie? Check. What could go wrong, right?

  RIGHT?

 We arrive at the restaurant at 6:00. After a short wait, we're lead to the table right next to the kitchen, tantalizing smells wafting out to us every time the door swings open or shut.

  6:30, we finally meet our waitress. On the plus side, it gives us time to get our order all sorted out: shakes, egg roll appetizers, chicken chow mein, and kung pow chicken.

  7:00, our waitress finally comes back. With our shakes. The smells from the kitchen are like knives to our growling stomachs.

  We start making bets on how long it will take to get our food. McKay guesses twenty more minutes. I guess forty. McKay thinks I'm crazy.

  If only.

  On a side note, did I mention Lincoln's bedtime is 6? And we brought him with us? Because it is, and we totally did. We didn't think it would be a big deal; dinner usually takes about an hour, right? And Lincoln loves people watching, and we'd feed him off our plates to keep him nice and distracted. But after the first twenty minutes, sugar packets and spoons just aren't cutting it on the entertainment factor. Finally, McKay takes him outside to walk around a bit while we wait for our food. I tell him I'll call if it ever comes.

  Two minutes later, the appetizers finally arrive. I call McKay and he hurries back in. We are starving, so the egg rolls are gone within two minutes. We give the last one to Lincoln to gnaw on as a distraction, and we watch him eat it enviously.

  We wait some more.

  The time is now 7:30. I win the bet. Sort of. There's still no food. Lincoln won't last much longer. We wistfully state we should have ordered our food as take-out. Then we could be home, watching our movie while we ate, with no baby wigging out.

   LIGHT BULB.

  We snag our waitress the next time we spot her hurrying by and ask if we can get our food to-go. She agrees, and we congratulate ourselves on our awesomeness.

  7:45. The couple across from us who came AFTER us have had their food for ten minutes. We eye them jealously, our stomachs moaning in unison.

  7:50. The food comes in a giant paper bag to the sound of a Hallelujah chorus. You astute readers will notice that this is nearly two hours after we arrived.

  We rush home, put Lincoln to bed, and start our show. We rented Looper (to be watched on Clearplay, don't freak out), which we'd both wanted to see for some time.

  Two years ago, Looper would have been slightly disturbing to me. Now, McKay and I are both traumatized. We are apparently not desensitized enough to watch violence mixed with small children. When I go to the bathroom after the movie, I see that my mascara has been smeared halfway down my face. I resist the urge to go up to Lincoln's room and hold him close all night long.

  Not the best movie choice for Valentine's Day. McKay and I agree we should have gotten Pirates: Band of Misfits. We crawl into bed, thoroughly spent.



  Any of you guys have a Valentine's Day that didn't turn out quite as expected?

  

Party Animals

  McKay worked late last night and missed the last bus home. Which meant Lincoln and I got to drive a half-hour to Corvallis to pick him up, and then another half-hour drive home.

  We had planned a Lord of the Rings marathon, but since it was already 8 by that point, we decided to just stick with the Fellowship, since the extended version would end about midnight. Then we would have some Martinelli's and toast in the New Year.

  We made it to the end of the first disk. Well, I did. McKay fell asleep somewhere in the first hour, while I asked a bunch of technical questions he didn't know the answer to. Like, are wizards born? Can they reproduce? What IS Sauron, race-wise? Why are giant eagles always so willing to do Gandalf's bidding, yet he seems to forget about the possibilities there unless he's about to die?

  For the record, I think I would make an excellent hobbit.

  Anyway, by the time the screen said, "Insert disk two", I pulled out the Martinelli's, had a nice swig, dragged the mostly unconscious McKay to bed and promptly fell asleep myself.

  It was 10:30.


   How did you guys ring in the New Year? Probably not as awesomely as us.

After Presents

MCKAY: So, what happened to that one truck thing we were going to give Lincoln for Christmas?

ME: I don't know. I asked you to put it in your bag.

[We stare at each other for a few seconds]

MCKAY: . . . So it's your fault, then.

I'm the Devil, Apparently

McKay: [after asking me my opinions about various Christmas movies] I don't much care for your taste in movies, Juju!

Me: You knew what I was when you married me.

McKay: That sounds like a seminary movie I watched in high school.

Me: Yeah. I'm the snake.

McKay: You're the devil?!

Me: No, the SNAKE.

McKay: . . . Who was the devil in that metaphor.

Me: Oh. Well. You knew what I was when you married me.

Disneyland is like a Disease of Happiness

  This was the first time that McKay and Lincoln were able to be at Disneyland together, and let me tell you, it was pretty much an explosion of adorable. And hilarious.

  For example, when we were in line for Pirates of the Caribbean, I realized that there was a not-so-great smell emanating from Lincoln's behind. I believe the word "loaded" was used to describe the situation, which naturally led to this:

    Lincoln also got to meet Doug from Up. I can't praise Disney workers enough, whoever played Doug was really funny. He even thoroughly licked a little girl's autograph book. I thought it was a nice touch. I was really happy that Lincoln was rather enthralled by the encounter as well, since those characters can seem scary sometimes.

  Dad came later in the day and limped his way through the fun because of a recent injury. I kept urging him to get one of those electric wheelchair thingies, but he didn't take me seriously. Dang.

  I also got in some baby snuggles, but for the most part, Lincoln only wanted McKay. Can't blame him, McKay is pretty awesome.

"Why is this person holding me?!!"

  It was a fantastically fun time, and McKay is now becoming a full Disney convert. I'm so proud! Oh, and Lincoln, too, of course.We're indoctrinating him young. It is the Beesley way. He LOVED how much there was to see, and he wasn't even afraid of all the freaky kid rides! I think he's too busy analyzing to be afraid, really. His little head darted back and forth all day, trying to see everything going on. He is so McKay's son.

  I love you, Disneyland.

Homage to October 19th

  October 19th was supposed to be a special day, full of fun and laughter and, most of all, the start of the last season of Community. But now, as explained by the cast, October 19th is now a feeling in our hearts to keep close. Here's the video explaining it all:

  McKay was preparing a special homage, but, like October 19th, it will have to be in a special place in our hearts, since it is no more.

  First, he grew a manly-like beard:

   After the premier was initially pushed back, he kept it a while longer, hoping it would be soon. But as that day became indefinite, he stylized his beard. The Starburns/Aex way.

  Keep October 19th close. It is a feeling of love. And itchiness, if you're McKay.

Halloweenies

  After MONTHS of preparation in gathering materials and some assembly required, here we are! Yet another reference to our obsession:

   YAY, DOCTOR WHO!

   I'm Amy the kissogram/Bobby and Lincoln is Rory the Roman! (It was cheaper to make Lincoln the Roman Centurion costume rather than McKay, or Lincoln would have been the Doctor. Then this costume pairing wouldn't be so incestuous-seeming. Ah, well) This is the only halfway decent picture of me, but it's still not great. This weekend we may do a better shoot so you can see all the details we spent all our time and moneys on.

   And, of course, we have to have a Doctor! I think McKay pulled it off quite well. Lincoln was a trooper and put up with our trick-or-treating for an entire hour. Thank goodness we have an excuse to go again! We got a good haul since next to no one goes trick-or-treating here, and people were giving candy by the handful.

  This is McKay in a "Minute to Win It" game at the church Halloween party. He started launching the cookie off his face and attempting to catch it rather than let it slide down. It looked incredibly Doctor-ish.

   A close-up so you can see some of the details of Lincoln's costume. His was BY FAR the hardest to do. The breast plate was bought at the dollar store and sized down for Lincoln by McKay. The cape was an old shirt from the thrift store, the leather skirt consists of old leather belts, boots, and a purse that we cut down to size and sewed (mostly done by McKay). The boots, pants, and red shirt were all thrift store finds. The bracers were made by McKay, as were the criss-crossing shoulder belt things.

  When it came to carving the pumpkin yesterday, I decided to only buy one because I knew McKay was going to do such an awesome job it would put me to shame. So I stuck to pulling out the pumpkin guts, something I enjoy more than I should. I then suggested off-hand that maybe we stick with the Doctor Who theme, maybe with a simple carving of the logo or maybe the TARDIS.

  "Or an Ood!" McKay joked.
  Or so I thought.

  He then looked up some videos of how to shave pumpkins to get more detail, and stayed up til 2 AM last night to finish this baby:

  He's just amazing at everything. It's so unfair.

  How was your Halloween?

Lincoln presents. . . Calvin and Hobbes!

  We did something awesome again!

  Well, mostly McKay did. He's the Photoshop wizard in the family and did 99% of the work. But I had the original idea, so yay me, too!

    Here's the original Calvin and Hobbes cartoon that was our inspiration, done by the brilliant Bill Watterson, of course:

Source

    And here is our homage, an obvious work of art in its own right. We give you. . . Lincoln and Tiger Lincoln! (title is a work in progress)

A Very Merry Unbirthday to Me!

  Yesterday McKay was home sick, and I decided that that meant I got to open my birthday presents early.

  Okay, this was my rationale: McKay was going to be home all day, which meant he would be missing a lot of work. Meaning there was no way he could come home early on my actual birthday. Also, as already mentioned, he was going to be HOME ALL DAY. So I had to decide whether I would rather celebrate a few days early and have my husband with me ALL DAY, or wait until my actual birthday, spend most of the day alone with Lincoln being bored, then have maybe 2-3 hours with McKay, in which to squeeze in making dinner, making cookies (I decided I wanted chocolate chip cookies rather than cake this year), open presents, etc. All of which I would probably be too exhausted to enjoy properly. So, yeah, it was kind of a no-brainer.

  After a morning of being responsible with cleaning and errands, McKay asked if I was ready to open presents. I commanded, in my most regal birthday voice, for him to bring them down.

  He handed me one small package and a card.

Lincoln refused to help me open things. I was saddened by this, as he normally loves ripping paper to shreds (teething. Lame).

   I read the card and, like a good sport, said, "Oh, geez. You're going to make me work for my presents, aren't you?"

  "YEAH!! It's fun!" said McKay.

  *big sigh* said I.

  I opened the present and it was an old hardcover version of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. And, tucked into the end cover. . .

  A TREASURE MAP AND CODE! Of course. Here's a close-up:

  The numbers went along with the book. The first number was for the page number, second number to the line, and third number to the word on that line.

  I could tell from the symbols that the map was for the Masonic graveyard right across the street.
 McKay also did a pretty good job with the number of steps, there was only one time I couldn't tell which path through the tombstones I was supposed to follow.

Because what better place to celebrate your birthday than a graveyard, right?

   When I finally got to the appointed spot, there was a letter for me. . .

  . . . which said the presents were back at the house.

  Silly husband. How I love you and your weird, nonsensical schemes.

  Anyway, then I finally got my PRESENTS!! (I literally yelled, "PRESENTS!!" about twenty times while I was opening them)

   Along with this awesome print my mom and dad got for me (love it!), McKay painted me an adorable little canvas of another painting I love (which I didn't include a picture of here for possible copyright reasons, but trust me, it's friggin' rad), I got three new books, some DVDs (including The Avengers and season four of Doctor Who!!), and some accessories for our Halloween costumes we really needed. Plus more.

  No birthday is complete without a Lincoln in a box!

  Thank you to my wonderful partner in crime, McKay, and my parents for spoiling me far too much! Love you, and thanks for a memorable non-birthday birthday!